"Are you sure?" his piercing ice blue eyes meet mine. I can see the sincerity and genuine care, the look in his eyes speaks so many words we've always left unsaid.
"Yes Sir, I'm sure." I nod, knowing if I show any sign of hesitation or uneasiness, he won't continue.
"okay." He takes my hand and leads me into the room. "Wait here."
I watch him walk away and clasp my hands together before smoothing my skirt. I need this, I know I do. I focus on my breathing, willing myself to calm the butterflies fluttering in my stomach. Despite how anxious I am, deep down from experience I know I will feel better once this is over. I know I need this. Thereās nothing else that will help calm my mind of these self deprecating thoughts. I keep my eyes focused on the abstract patterns in the antique wood grain, centering myself with an inner pep talk and deep breaths.
When I hear his footsteps on the hardwood floor, I look up slightly but don't meet his eyes. Keeping my eyes trained to the ground, I watched lustfully as he kicked off his shoes and rolled up his sleeves, leaving a few buttons undone on his dress shirt. I feel myself relax, almost forgetting why we are here as I take in the sight of his muscular forearms as he reaches for the remote on the end table. Once the lights are dimmed, he turns the volume down on the stereo and grins in my direction.
"I want us to hear everything tonight, Sweet Girl."
I have always melted when he calls me that, and he knows it. I breathe out a breath I didnāt realize I was holding, relaxing my shoulders unconsciously as my mind floods with memories of when he had called me that in the past. Some more lustful contexts have heat rushing to my cheeks before I snap back to reality when he speaks again.
"Tonight is going to be as simple or as complicated as you make it. You're in control. Remember that. Any changes to the menu before we begin?"
The vibrato in his deep voice sends shivers down my spine. I think back to our earlier conversation and shake my head.
"No Sir. Same safe words, same limits. Same request for end result."
He nods, then takes my hand and leads me further into the room. He has the look of pure focus and lust for me as he sets things up around the room, setting me up in a spot directly under the spotlight. I should have seen this coming. He knows I prefer background noise and I am most comfortable when I am not directly under the spotlights in the room. As always he is very specific and intentional about each action, wanting to make this a very effective lesson for me any way he can. It's what I asked for, so I can't complain. He gets off on teaching me lessons, I know he does.
At first, it was intimidating, but over time I've not only grown accustomed to this side of him, but I find I trust him implicitly. And that's why I came here to him today. He understood that there was no convincing me out of my feelings, and he knew what I needed. He always has. I know what comes next isn't meant to be comfortable, it's meant to be a lesson, one I asked for for me, so I can properly work through these emotions.
He takes his time setting things up just the way he wants them then sits in the large recliner in the corner next to the window. Propping up his left ankle over his right knee, he clasps his hands together and leans back, then takes a glance at his watch. I focus on the rise and fall of his chest, continuing to avoid eye contact despite how much I want to look at him.
It's as if time stands still for a few moments as we are taking each other in before he says, "strip, then take three steps towards the bed, and remind me why we're here."
I unzip my skirt and step out of it before pulling my blouse over my head. From there I reach behind and unclasp the hooks of my bra in the center of my back, and then shimmy out of my matching underwear. I'm not sure if the sudden chill in the air is real or just a figment of my imagination. I take three steps towards the bed just as he instructed, facing the foot of the bed, directly centered between the posts. Before I didn't understand the decor in this room, but now as I take in the view in the mirrors panning across most of the walls around me, I see everything is strategically placed. My mouth goes dry and force a swallow, clearing my throat to speak.
"We are here because I asked for this, I need this."
"Not good enough Rose. That's your one pass. Try again." Damn this man for knowing me so well.
When I don't speak right away he stands and approaches, standing directly behind me within two strides. Feeling the heat of his breath on my neck, I do my best not to react as he stares at me, watching his reflection in the mirror as he is admiring my body from behind.
"We are here because I need to get through these emotions, release the guilt and pain I've been feeling through this lesson, so I may let go so I can move forward." I need him to know I'm serious and level headed about this.
"Much better Rose."
He guides me forward and then takes my left hand in his. He kisses my palm gently before lifting my arm and securing my wrist in the cuff on the bedpost. He repeats this with my right hand, then each leg, each time checking to ensure I'm secure but comfortable. Completely restrained, I focus on my breathing, finding solace in what little control I have. I watch him pace behind me in the mirrors, slight smirk on his face as he watches me. His eyes meet mine in the reflection and I see a knowing look, he is calculating his next step very carefully, while building up the anticipation making me wait.
After what feels like an eternity, he speaks again. "I am starting off slow, and will be increasing the intensity of my approach as we go. You can cry, you can scream, you can fight the restraints like this as long as you like. Unless you safe word, I will continue. You will count, you will answer my questions and address me properly. We stop when I'm ready, when I know you've learned the lesson, and your opinion on that doesn't matter. Understood?"
"Yes Master."
"Then let's begin. Count."
I don't have much of a warning before he delivers a sharp blow to my ass, right in the sit spot. "one." From there he peppers swats alternating buttcheeks. "Twooo, thhhreeee. Fooooouurrr!" by this point I feel the heat and sting growing with each passing blow. "Five! Sixxxxx" I hiss, that last one was tender and I see him give me a knowing smirk in the reflection of the mirror. "Seven, fuck! Eight! Ohhhhh nnnine, t...t-ten." Ahh I'm not going to be able to sit for a week after this.
He stands closer again. Rubbing and squeezing my pink cheeks as he whispers in my ear. "Your ass is so beautiful as it reddens. We're just warming up, you're doing good sweet girl." he reaches around and kneads my tits, pinching and tugging on my nipples as he goes, rewarding me with that pleasure just momentarily before taking it away. My knees are weak at his touch, arousal pooling at my center as he continues.
"Now we're going to continue, I'll count, you focus on thinking about what you're learning so you can tell me after. Understood?"
"Yes Master." he steps back, and then begins with much firmer swats than before. One after another, I feel the white hot heat and the stinging increase with my arousal, tears forming in my eyes as I take them.
"How are we feeling Rose?" he asks, pausing for a moment to look me in the eyes.
"It hurts Master." I answer truthfully.
He chuckles, I watch him admiring my ass in the mirror. "Good. It's supposed to hurt, sweet girl." He starts pacing behind me, three steps left, three steps right, then back again. He does this so I can't anticipate his cadence, landing his next swats unevenly as he sees fit. We go on like this for what feels like an eternity, I have lost count of how many times his hands have connected with ass at this point.
I know deep down everything that has happened isn't all my fault but I have had the 'what if's' in my head casting this dark shadow for too long. I feel myself getting lighter, letting those go as I take this, blow after blow forcing me to feel, relive and see truth. "Ahhh" I cry out as he lands another in a tender spot.
He pauses behind me, recognizing I'm close to my limit here. Kneading my now thoroughly bruised ass, he asks, "Have you let it go Rose? Do you feel you've learned the lesson? Are you ready to move forward?" Knowing the consequences of my actions, and internalizing that it wasn't my fault is hard, but I do think I've made progress here.
"I do feel better. It wasn't my fault, but I needed to pay anyways." I answer truthfully.
"And pay you have. You've done so well sweet girl. And your ass is such a lovely shade, consider that a souvenir from today's lesson. In fact, just to make sure we've penetrated that stubborn mind of yours, we are going to do five more, then I'll be pleased. You can take five more to please me right Rose?" Despite not wanting any more pain, I want to please him. "Yes Master." I say, bracing for more.
Instead, he slips his hand between my folds and inserts two fingers into my wet dripping entrance. I moan and he chuckles again. "I know this was painful for you, but you are so aroused right now, I'm considering this wasn't enough punishment for you."
"It was Master. I assure you I learned-... I am learning my lesson." I bite back another moan as he pumps his fingers in and out of me.
"Good." He looks me in the eyes as he pulls his fingers out of my cunt and sucks them into his mouth, making a show of tasting my arousal before stepping back and connecting another swat right on my sit spots.
"Fuck!" I don't have time to recover before he delivers another, then another. "Ahhh!"
"Two more. If you can take them without making a sound, I'll consider making you come afterwards." With that challenge on the table, I know he isn't going to make this easy on me.